Conflict Resolution

We can't avoid conflict, but we can take steps to resolve it.

As much as we may try to avoid conflict, it is inevitable in our everyday lives to encounter it. At home, work, or just out and about-- there isn’t a lot we can do to fully avoid it!

However, conflict can be necessary for growth. Conflict fuels change. It signals that something needs to happen or change so both parties can move forward happier and healthier. Conflict signals that something just isn’t working, and that’s ok!

Conflict can be uncomfortable. It can feel difficult and while we would much rather take the easier way out (avoid it, ignore it, gloss over it), getting rid of conflict actually hinders us quite a bit. It can keep us stuck in a stagnant, resentful cycle of never having our needs met.

Even if a conflict ends up in a disagreement, or a fight, or a standoff-- it isn’t the end of the world. You can take the time you need and come back to the subject, perhaps even with fresh eyes.

So, how can you go about handling conflict in a healthy way

so it becomes a growth opportunity rather than a huge mess?

When a conflict happens there are a few things you can do in the moment to guide towards a peaceful ending. Keeping calm and collected, taking a step back if things get heated, ask for a pause if you need to collect your thoughts better (the ZForm can come in handy in the pre-conflict stages if it’s something you can foresee happening).

Make sure you’re listening to the other person and understanding what they’re saying as well. Oftentimes, a conflict can easily be resolved by compromise and being honest with the other person, but it isn’t always easy to see that in the moment.

But a lot of times a conflict can arise out of nowhere, and you’re left to do damage control instead.

So what can you do?

Here are 5 steps you can take right away to help resolve the conflict.

1. Define the source of the conflict. They say there are always three sides to a story: yours, mine, and the truth. Make sure you are doing your best to see both sides of the issue. And if you can’t, don’t feel bad about asking someone to be a mediator for the conflict. Having a non-biased third party can be a great breath of fresh air and perspective. But getting to the root of the problem will help you take steps to resolve it.