Communication Styles
Knowing your communication style can be extremely helpful in growing your skills and building better relationships with your peers. And, the more you’re able to recognize these styles, the more you’ll be able to see them and adapt to different conversations.
There are 4 core types of conversation styles.
Passive
indifferent
“go with the flow” type of attitude
usually, fail to express their own needs or feelings
inability to say no
“people pleaser” type
avoid confrontation at all costs
poor posture/lack of eye contact
Aggressive
tend to “dominate” the conversation
“me, me, me”
loud and demanding tone
poor listening to others
tend to talk over others
aggressive body language (pointing fingers, staring intently, lack of personal space, etc)
can be hostile or threatening
wants to “win” every conversation
Passive-Aggressive
combines both aspects of the previous styles
passive on the surface, aggressive underneath
difficulty acknowledging their underlying anger
words don’t align with actions
facial expressions don’t match words
may sabotage behind people’s backs or use vindictive ways to “get back” at someone
aware of their needs, but have trouble articulating them
can start rumours or gossip
tends to be a very toxic style
Assertive
thought to be the most effective style
aim for both sides to win
can express their own needs while being considerate of others’
“I” statements
encourages open, honest dialogue
balanced conversation
relaxed body language
ability to say “no” and set healthy boundaries
There is also a fifth style listed on some sites called the Manipulative style. These people will do whatever it takes to get their way. Cunning and deceitful, they rarely say what they mean. They often prioritize their own needs above everyone else, but instead of just outright saying it (like the aggressive style), they do it in a sneaky, roundabout way. They end up becoming very difficult to trust, so this isn’t a suggested style to adopt.